spinning in the kitchen
racing thoughts become a blur
my heart is pounding
i can hear you laughing
laughing both of us
and for a moment
, just one moment,
everything’s alright
heel turn
pirouette
arms outstretched and in for speed and
out again for feeling
join me in a chorus of sweet nothings
incantations spoken with a grin
joy
stimulations
wash away my sins my
worry
worry blurry fears my tears
humble adulations
danger
get set go, congratulations
this train has no brakes for when its gone too far
and so we spin
is it enough?
how could it be enough you’re selfless
clothe the poor and feed the sick
heal the hungry laying bricks
tear down my walls and build foundations
shrines cathedrals neuromutations
somewhere for me to sit when done
when all is set and done i lose
myself in grand delusions: can I truly see you?
am I blind or tinted rouge?
of course im blind
my thoughts are racing
hearts become a blur
so teach me how to spin,
so I can learn to laugh again
rigidity
inflexible thinking
my behavior is
stereotyped
compulsive
injurious
i didn’t know how to cope until I spun with you
its hard to break these patterns
patterns
patterns a.b. schemes and loops
and cycles laugh cry spin and swoop
our masks split open
ear to ear
be still my dear and disappear
your cracks are showing
fear you’ve sown begins to rear
its ugly head, the gale is blowing
lose your smile in the knowing
choke on blood and feel the rise
of toxic traits i wish weren’t mine
call me a good girl
, break my face
my heart
the heat
the steam
embrace
and sigh in darkness
pull me in
my pen is breaking through my skin
oh god im falling in again i need a hand i need a friend not
memories draped in psychosis
schizoaffective lose my focus burn my ends
ozzy auzzie oy! and then
i miss you
and im sorry
beneath the sable cover of the night
the heavens are dark the earth is shining bright
we dance until the fiery light of day
our masks expose and visage melt away
